I had a chance to play with my 10-year old niece and 6 year-old nephew this past weekend. We were happily tossing a yellow Frisbee®* around in the yard. My nephew retrieved another Frisbee, this one blue, from the house. An argument began to bubble up about which color was whose Frisbee.
Having had some experience with said types of arguments, I quickly put on my social coach’s cap and jumped into the fray. I took hold of both the Frisbees. (Taking command of the disputed item or items will quickly give you the rapt attention of both parties involved in a skirmish.) I started the process of problem solving.
Me: “Boy, we have a problem here. You both really want the blue Frisbee. It’s a problem that we only have one. What do you guys think we could do about this?”
Niece: “You can just give it to me.”
Me: “I know you would really like this blue one, But I don’t think it’s a solution your brother agrees with.”
Nephew: “No way.”
Me: “Does this sound fair? How about I put both Frisbees behind my back and you can pick a hand and solve it that way. Would that work?”
Me: “I’m going to let (my nephew) choose the hand since he went in the house to the get the blue Frisbee. Fair?”
My nephew chose my right hand and received the yellow Frisbee. A brief expression of sadness came across his face, but he also understood the fairness of the how we solved it. That disappointment was immediately followed by delight when he noted his Frisbee exactly matched the Minion™**on his shirt, as the Frisbee “fight” turned into Frisbee “fair”.
*Frisbee® is a registered trademark of Wham-O Toys. **Minion is a registered trademark of Universal Studios.