By Nadine Briggs
When something drags you down, who is there to help pick you back up? Do you have someone who will listen to your ugly moments without judging you, or sharing his or her even uglier moment to “one-up” you? True friendship can really boil down to who you trust to share that soft underbelly with, and who will not disappoint you when you do. That one person who won’t tell your uglies to someone else, but who will listen without necessarily trying to solve your problem and just listen with a caring heart.
I witnessed such a friendship the other day. One friend was saddened by the death of a pet and the other lovingly talked about how awesome the pet was with a heartfelt and true understanding of her friend’s sadness. I watched knowing that the moment they were having was a defining one. I knew that this meant that they had each found a very true friend in the other person. The moment was all about the comforting friend by caring about what the the sad friend cared about and not about herself. Those selfless moments are how deep friendships are made and nurtured. It’s a text to your friend who is getting medical results “Hey, thinking of you today and sending hugs.” It’s checking in with how the new school is going “You started today, right? How was the first day?” It’s being there when your friend says, “Hey, let’s catch up today, OK?” and knowing that it’s code for “I need to talk to you.” It’s just letting friends know that they are awesome when someone knocks them back a bit.
In your next ugly moment, think of who you can share it with to help ease your burden. You will be taking a risk, for sure, but if he or she comes through for you, the reward is a deeper and lasting friendship.
