By Donna Shea
I’ve been struggling a lot this week with body odor and bad breath. Fortunately, not my own (at least I think I’m okay!) No, I’ve been trying to desperately figure out how to tell a adult person there is a problem, and I cannot come up with a solution that won’t be hurtful or cause this person embarrassment. I don’t know this person well at all, but because I live a secret second life as a dance instructor, I must dance with this person in order to teach this person how to dance. So must other people in the class.
With the kids or teens in my social groups, I don’t have any problem at all calling out the need for an application of deodorant (most kids at that age will remember to put it on in the morning and then not realize a second application might be needed later in the day or after doing something active). We also talk in our groups about the importance of good hygiene – including bathing or showering (with soap), the care of hair, skin and teeth, clean clothes and more. Another social coach who is a friend of mine also pointed out that there are also some kids that may even need us to remind them about bathroom-related hygiene, even at older ages.
I still don’t quite know what to do about telling adults. In researching ideas about how to gently tell someone, I came across WashYaSelf.com. Their blog also includes some great tips. It may present a solution to this very difficult problem without having to have the very uncomfortable and embarrassing conversation face-to-face.
Poor hygiene is, in our opinion as social coaches, the number one barrier to making and keeping friends. Whether we like it or not, people do make snap judgments about us based on how we present ourselves physically to the world, and if we smell, no one will get close enough to our outside self to get to know our really awesome inside self. So let’s all remember those three important words:
Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
